“Why doesn’t this kid ever listen?”
Little Jerome was tagging along with his mom on a mission. “Mom, I can have this?” he pleaded. They were in the cereal aisle, and mom was comparing the labels of generic raisin bran and the brand name...
View ArticleSo You Killed Your Cat. Now What?
“Do you think we should tell the kids what really happened? What they don’t know won’t hurt them, right?” Recently we received these questions when a parent accidentally ran over the sleeping, aging...
View ArticleAre You Teaching Your Kids to Be Angry?
It starts with our example. Angry kids almost always have angry examples to follow. If those examples are parents, and those parents stay angry over the years, little can be done before their...
View ArticleDo Your Questions Help or Hurt Your Kids?
Ed was trying to be patient and thoughtful, but he was at the end of his rope. Instead of helping him fix dinner, his two daughters were upstairs arguing loudly and disrespectfully. As he listened he...
View ArticleDads: Would You Take a Bullet for Your Kids?
Many dads sacrifice much for their families. They work tirelessly, keep up with the house (grass, snow removal, repairs, etc), coach, serve at church or in the community among other things. Thanks,...
View ArticleThe Best Defense against “Hook-up Culture” is a Good Offense
American culture is more sexually charged than at any other time in history. Sex is no longer valued by the general population as an intimate expression of love and commitment to be shared in a...
View ArticleThe Key to Consistent Parenting
It is often said that consistency is an important key to effective parenting. We agree wholeheartedly. However, we believe consistency is not so much about the method we choose, but the heart behind...
View ArticleAre You Teaching Your Child to Ignore You?
We’ve often heard parents say, “I hate to yell, but the kids just won’t listen until I do!” If the kids aren’t listening to requests, it may be about more than inattentiveness. It could be that the...
View ArticleThe Conundrum of Trust
When kids trust they feel safe; they know they’re loved. Trust leads to respect and true obedience. Kids who trust look to their parents for wisdom and follow their parents’ examples in desirable ways....
View ArticleThis Kid Changed Overnight! Here’s How…
Sometimes it takes a while for parents to change in ways that lead to deeper respect from their kids. Sometimes it can happen fast. When Dan attended our weekend workshop he saw an immediate change by...
View ArticleHow do I talk to my kids about race?
Parents, are you struggling with how to address the recent racial tension that has exploded across the United States? At Connected Families we are on the side of Justice, Grace and Peace, without any...
View ArticleHow do you grow when you’ve blown it?
Lynne and I blew it a lot. We had a lot of great moments as a young family, but we also had a lot of bad moments – the kind of stuff that over time can lead to growing disconnection between parents and...
View ArticlePractical Skills to Pick Up the Pieces After You Blow It
Last week we wrote about what to do when we blow it. We suggested that overcoming parenting mistakes isn’t so much about not making them (which is good because we made TONS of them), but about being...
View ArticleThe most sure-fire road to respectful kids!
“Knock it off! Stop it! Get over here, NOW!” These are familiar phrases for most parents. When kids act up we get frustrated. We get demanding and even disrespectful. Kids may comply with our demands...
View ArticleHow to Turn a Parenting Fail into a Parenting Win
It was a Sunday evening. I was emotionally and physically done for the day and looking forward to a quiet house. Suddenly I overheard squabbling about who was the rightful owner of a large stuffed...
View ArticleDo your conversations with your kids about faith help or hurt?
Laura was stuck. Though she was passionate about bringing her boys up “in the training and instruction of the Lord,” she could tell that her oldest son Connor, at only 4, was already getting...
View ArticleAffirmation: The Struggle to Stay Positive [video]
“Stay positive.” It’s almost a cliche at this point. But the parenting truth behind this oft-spoken statement is that kids need constructive affirmation and encouragement from their parents. This...
View Article“You’re the worst mom ever! Everybody hates you!”
Sometimes when parents make constructive parenting changes, things appear to get worse before they get better. This is because changes, even positive ones, throw kids off-balance. They live by a...
View ArticleBusiness Wisdom for Parents
We were excited to see our frequently-used concept of “the do over” appear on the blog of business and leadership guru Seth Godin, and we think his insights apply just as much to parents as to...
View ArticleWhy “It Is NOT OK to Talk That Way!” Doesn’t Work
There are many ways in which parents intentionally or unintentionally model positive character qualities: self-control, caring, diligence, faithfulness, etc. But we can also model negative character...
View ArticleThe Most Effective Way to Teach Kids to Pray
As parents, we want what’s best for our children, including a life of strong faith, values, and prayer. Sometimes it can seem like a daunting task — how do I teach faith to my children? How do I help...
View ArticleWhat Tone are You Setting for Your Home?
A mom of three kids ages 10 to 14 emailed me this story this week: A friend once told me she worked to greet her children with enthusiasm, even if they had just come into the kitchen from the living...
View ArticleQuestions to Put the THANKS Back in Thanksgiving
“So, kids, what are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?” you ask. “My family, my house, my friends, my dog and Jesus.” (Same answers as last year….) If you think your kids might be open to some deeper...
View ArticlePlanning a vacation this year? Read this first.
Your kids are watching you. Constantly. All the subtle messages from the way you live life are being absorbed by their active little minds, even if neither you nor your child are aware of it. During...
View ArticleBullying: Challenge or Opportunity?
Throughout the United States, October is national bullying prevention month and today, October 24, many schools around the country will encourage their kids to wear orange in support of anti-bullying....
View Article“I’m the Parent. I Don’t HAVE to Say Please”
Have you heard ungrateful demands (like the ones below) from kids who seem to expect you to drop your life in order to take care of them? “Mom! Where’s dinner?” “Dad, I need a ride to the gym!”...
View ArticleParent or Friend
“Kids don’t need us to be their friends, they need us to be their parents!” The dad huffed, frustrated that I had suggested his teen daughter might be seeing her mom and dad more as enemies than...
View ArticleShould Parents Have Do-Overs Too?
We frequently hear from parents, in coaching and in conversation, who say that it is really hard to break the habit of harsh responses and anger. They feel discouraged with themselves when there is...
View ArticleYour kids? They’re watching. ALL the time.
In this podcast, Chad Hayenga and Jim Jackson will challenge you to think through what you’re modeling as you parent. They’ll equip you with natural, effective ways to “live your life out loud” in a...
View ArticleTo Spank or Not to Spank?
If you work with Christian parents, it’s tempting to stay far away from the spanking debate. There are the “never spank” parents, the “immediate obedience or get spanked” parents, and everything...
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